There are testimonies and stories out there, that we have all heard, of those Christians that came to profess faith in Christ at an early age. They understood the importance of holiness almost immediately. They remained virgins until meeting and marrying their wives or husbands at a rather early age and then lived a life that was glorifying to God.
Though these testimonies are great and I thank and praise God for them whenever I hear them, I also realize that they are sadly not the norm.
I will use myself as the example here. I didn't grow up in a Christian household and holiness was an abstract concept to me that I only heard of in passing. I didn't hear of Christ at anything close to an early age. In fact, I was 19 when I first heard even a watered down version of the gospel and well into my twenties when I finally came to understand it (at least from an intellectual standpoint). I had gotten married and divorced, both without knowing Christ at all. Afterward I became promiscuous and, though not as wild as some, lived a life of relative debauchery.
Then came a turning point. I met someone that invited me to church. At this church I was first confronted with why sin truly was and was prompted to "give my life to Christ". Now this is where I started living pure and studying the deep mysteries of the bible, becoming a modern day Luther or Calvin, right? Nope! Not even close. That same person that invited me to the church was my girlfriend at the time and we had anything but a pure relationship. After we broke up, the sinning still continued though now it was accompanied by at least a small knowledge about God. I even began studying some theology! I could talk about doctrine with the best of them and would even shock myself at times with how profound I sounded. I presented a great image of a young, honorable Christian man outwardly. But inside I was full of dead men's bones. A mere whitewashed tomb that contained nothing but death. Though I did in fact continue to study theology and even read some of the classics by the most influential church fathers, I had yet to make the connection between what I was reading and studying and how I was living.
Then one day it dawned on me...I was a nominal Christian. Sure, if someone asked me what I was I'd say "Christian" or if I took a survey I would check the box marked, you guessed it, "Christian". But my thoughts, words and even actions always betrayed the truth and said "hypocrite"!
You see, I commented regularly on Christian websites and posts on social media. I had people contact me and ask me to comment on Christian themes or topics or just ask my advice. Why? Because they perceived me as being a "well versed Christian man". But as deep and as thought provoking as my responses and essays were, they weren't deep enough, in my life! I was a Christian with a shallow faith.
But now I was aware of it. So, what happened next, right?
Well, I attempted to rectify the errors. After years of studying and conversing and explaining it to others, it final hit home that God didn't require mere head knowledge or an intellectual assent to His revealed truth. No, he required obedience! He required sanctification! He required holiness!
But was it too late?!? Now that I finally came to the point of desiring God more than my sins. Now that I, at last, desired to live a life glorifying to God. Now, after all these years...would God even bother to hear me or, for that matter, believe me? And how would those people that have known me for some time react? I mean, those closest to me. Those that didn't fall for the persona I exhibited to the outside world. Those that knew the truth. All of these were questions and concerns that came up in the process of my figuring out what to do next.
The enemy was a busy little schemer too! I can't begin to tell you how often he would whisper in my ear, "you tried this before Barry...just give it up already" or "you don't even believe yourself, and you think God will?". "No one is going to believe you, and you'll be right back to your old ways" was what he constantly threw in my face. And though that voice was persistent and nagging, God's voice was louder still and His words more profound. From the scriptures His promises rang out. He spoke to me from Ephesians and from Romans and allowed me to realize that it was He that accomplished my salvation and it was for His own glory that He carried that out. That it didnt matter if my faith waivers, His word remains solid and true! And that, ultimately, as long as I had breath in my lungs and life in my body, it was NEVER too late to submit to Christ as not only my savior but as my Lord! That it was NEVER too late to be holy!
The ironic thing is that for about ten years I have always worn a ring bearing the inscription "HE DIED 4 ME, I LIVE 4 HIM". And now I can finally look at that ring and know that it isn't an empty slogan or saying. That it isn't mere jewelry. I can finally "LIVE 4 HIM"!
So, if you've been living a life that you know isn't a true representation of what God has done for you through Christ. If you've been wondering if your faith is even real or if it's simply too late to try to live right. If that small voice keeps telling you that your chance at holiness has expired or that you'll fall back into your ways. Then I encourage you to allow God to speak! His words are louder and truer and he's the one that gives you the ability to live a holy life. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" may be out of context on the football field, but it most certainly rings true in this case and when our own strength finds itself wavering in light of our own shortcomings. And remember, you will NEVER be able to live a life that's worthy of what Christ has done on the cross and is continuing to do today...but you should NEVER stop trying to do just that...